Learning God's Culture

(True story, real names have not been shared)
Ilsan, South Korea
2017

As a greenie missionary (new missionary) I had the opportunity to help teach a woman English. She was in her 50s; a successful business woman, married to a super successful businessman, up to date with the latest fashions, Starbucks always in hand,  and trying to salvage the rocky relationship with her 20-something year-old son.

Little side note: <<As missionaries for the Lord Jesus Christ, people trust us so much and their hearts open to let us in. Its an incredible thing to be a part of.>> Anyways----->

When her son was in junior high school, her and her husband decided to send their son to live in Australia at a boarding school so that he could learn English and be better cared for. They were so busy working that they didn't think they would have much time to raise him properly. So--- off he went!

Over the next few years of junior high and high school, the son felt  discriminated against, moments of racism aimed towards him (for being one of a few Koreans in their school) , and so he furiously rebelled against the school's headmaster.  Over time, instead of trying to "fit in", he went the complete opposite direction. 

But-- he never told his parents this. He didn't think they would care.

And his parents never knew. They talked to him on the phone but they didn't know what was really going on.

Now the son is in his late 20s and has since moved back to Korea to live with his parents while he works and explores university options. "Ever since he came back to Korea, we can't seem to stop fighting," said his mom. "We dont see eye to eye anymore." She wondered why her son, who was a cut-out version of herself as a child, was now someone who looked like her, had the same Korean genetics as her, but was somebody who she could not seem to find common ground with.

In that moment I told her, "Your son is Korean by blood... but, during his most influential years, he grew up in a completely different culture. He doesn't fit back into Korean society the way you want him to because he was not raised to think or act like a Korean. He is a foreigner in his own country."

It was like a light-bulb went off in her head. She now saw her son for who he had become instead of as who she wanted him to be.
She was so frustrated that he didn't want to live the traditional Korean life-- attend a brutally competitive Korean university, marry a nice, quiet Korean girl, get a well paying job, dress like a suave Korean man, and carry on the Korean customs and etiquette. They fought daily because they had different perspectives on life and different goals for the future.

This lady also has a sister who has spent over 10 years living in Europe. That sister and her mother "cannot agree on ANY subject", she says. No matter what this lady did (she even planned get-togethers with her mom and sister without telling the other and then didn't show up so that the mom and sister would have to be alone in the same room)-- their relationship was always strained.

Once again, another light-bulb moment. I told her, "it is the same concept as you and your son. They have developed different cultures!"

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After we had talked about this for a while, I decided to bring it in to a more spiritual light. 

I realized that we are the children sent off to a new place to live and grow and learn while our Heavenly Parents both await our return.

This earth-life stint has a really important purpose, and they definitely aren't the "checked-out" type of parents either. We can communicate-- in fact they WANT to communicate with us every day-- but, by way of plan, we live in a fallen world. It's kind of a different culture down here! 

I believe that is why it is so strongly emphasized throughout the gospel of Jesus Christ that we must "stand in holy places and be not moved". That we must make our homes into holy places, and that we must visit the house of the Lord as often as we can. If we don't try to spend time where He is, we will never know what He is like-- we will never become like Him.

And on that glorious day when we reunite with our Heavenly Father, we might feel a little out of place if we spent too much time on earth trying to be like the "world" and not enough like Him. 

So, fellow travelers in this journey called "life", remember: 

"We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience."

Find out more about God's Culture and our Purpose of Life in these two great books:

The Holy Bible

The Book of Mormon

Order your free copies of BOTH today at:

become.org